Breakfast Jester Gifts

A mouse pops out of a toaster

Egg Scare - You're trying to kill me, aren't you?

"I like the plastic toy, but not the cereal. Daddy can eat that."

"Better bring me another cookie. The last one fell in the water."

"You owe me five bucks."

Peter Pan, the Utensil that Never Grew Up

'It's the essence of springtime. You're really enjoying it.'

Recipes from The Lying Gourmet

'I don't think that's what they mean by reducing the wine.'

Husband bakes a pie

I used to eat plenty of natural foods, but then I found out that most people die of natural causes.

"Gigot de sept heures."

'Anybody for breakfast?'

'He's all eyes!'

'I had the recipe upside down, so it's beefed corn.'

"More helium."

'Do you want toast with that?'

'Mom! Instant oatmeal is NOT fast food!'

'The recipe said to simmer uncovered!'

'It's one of those trendy 'warm salads,' with sausage, fried eggs, bacon and black pudding.'

All you can eat chicken $3.95: "Cooked is 20 dollars extra."

Devilled Eggs

'I hate it when they order scrambled eggs.' (chef shaking chicken).

"Nice landing, Captain Crunch."

"Which one of my fiendish offspring defaced the bordelaise recipe with SpongeBob?"

'Diet? Yeah I'm on a prop's diet...pies,chips,burgers and coke!'

'And here on our left you see the sugary cereal aisle...a real crowd pleaser!'

A man flips a pancake onto a child's head

'Your tomato ketchup is on it's way, Sir...'

Frisbee dog catching pizza dough

"A barista should always follow his instincts."

Middle Age Spread.

'Purpose of visit?'

"Just how rare is this steak..."

"You confused the Sudso box with the Cruncho box."