Bratwurst Buff Gifts

'Will you get me those healthy eating booklets form the hospital? . . . I need something to start the fire to grill these bratwursts.'

A Good Batch.

Guy at drink stand says to Medium: 'Medium?'

Restaurant Francais: All you can pronounce £30.

-'but for a full English breakfast you can't beat Blackpool,sir.'

"Do you like it better when I go to the F or the Dm?"

Joe's 'Take Responsibility For Your Own Actions' Bar.

The Alpha Seltzer

"Beanirrito"

'So it's the Mumm's Cordon Rouge, '98 Pouilly-Fuisse, '86 Chateau Margaux, and the '92 Barsac - would you like any food?'

Baking

"Is Pinot Noir where you want to be?"

"I don't have the lip for saxaphone."

Lioness Shops for Snacks.

"Let's see. Seuss... Seuss... Here we go. That's a medium box of bagels and lox and a pop on the rocks by seven o' clock."

'As Chuck's definition of terroir dragged past the 20-minute mark, Suzy concluded, the longer the explanation, the less likely you know what the word means.'

"That’s a toaster. It’s a tanning bed for bread."

Better Not Squash.

'The Brothers of the Order of Saint Orson, patron saint of fried foods'

"You sure you guys don't spike the coffee?"

A cow goes to the Fortune Teller - 'I can see two all beef patties, special sauce, lettuce, cheese, pickles, onions, on a sesame seed bun...!'

Are laboratory grown foods the future of farming?

'The bigger they are... The harder they hit!'

Wine Tasting and Wine Guzzling

'Can I have flies with that'

French horn.

'You'll find it has a bouquet reminiscent of cherries and chocolate, a silky texture and best of all, for me, a 72% gross margin.'

National Coffee Day

"I hear you've a complaint about the eggs..."

"And I get a really, really tall straw?"

'Who's the new guy?'

'You've had enough.'

Fish flipping flapjack in pan. Title: 'Ed was glad he'd caught a panfish.'

'It's supposed to look and smell greasy.'

"I'm sure you've heard of foodies - he's a drinkie."