Boxing Humorist Gifts

'Lyle! You grabbed the wrong mouthpiece!'

"Keep working on his right knee, you're weaing him down."

'I told him: 'Use your jab. Move around the ring. Don't try to slug it out with this guy.''

'There were those who said 'Killer Carson' wasn't taking this fight seriously...'

Tooth Fairy sitting with judges at boxing match.

'Isn't your father that very tall boxer?'

'After the fight I was given a cup... To keep my teeth in.'

Boxing cheats

'No wait. It's not the end of the round. It's just my mobile ringing.'

Dick Cheneym NeoCon Pugilist.

'I can't believe this.. biggest fight of my life, and I forget to pack a wallop.'

All bets are off as Round One begins in the "Dollars versus Donuts" World Championship title fight.

"Don't worry, Ref, just shock, it's his first save all season."

'These goalscoring celebrations are getting out of hand.'

Punt Cake

Football Chameleon

'I don't understand why you always put me in goal?!'

Bobby's pitching coach told him to put some stank on the ball.

Alternative fielding positions

'He's got abdominal pain, dizziness and soreness in his extremities. I'll know more when I see X-rays...'

Trojan Hurdler.

"So what's this special distracting tactic you've developed?"

'I reckon we need a new sweeper.'

'Sean Connery was the best James Bond!'

'We went generic. The players' salaries are affordable.'

'I got a reverse hat trick. I let three goals in.'

'Why do they call him Neckline Ned.' - 'He's always plunging down the middle but never showing anything.'

Small country advertisng at the Olympics

Various men worshipping a statue of a football

'It looks suspiciously like Killer Hart is taking a dive!'

'He migrates through every year about this time. Just sits there and watches. We leave him alone and he leaves us alone...'

Footballer kicking his own brain.

'It Kicked!' - 'Punt, Drop or Tad?'

"With one wrong turn, Sparky's big adventure became a nightmare."

'He's definitely heading for a red card.'