Bored Date Survivor Pillows

"Do you have ANYTHING that will help me survive another 2 hours of him droning on about football, cars and his ex-relationship?"

"Now remember, if I jump out the window, I want to leave."

"Fresh pepper spray?"

In Desperate Straits.

"I said, 'You must be waiting for 'Mr. Right,' too.'"

"It was meant to be a surprise romantic dinner for two, but to cut a long story short, it's been a recipe for disaster."

"Hold your questions until I've talked so long no one knows or cares what you're asking about."

'When I wake up, remind me to give you a few tips on how to make your presentations a little more dynamic.'

"Monsieur has just ordered a vasectomy..."

'Jack, you're being way too entertaining. This is supposed to be a bored meeting.'

"I guess your reputation for tipping has preceded you!"

"Dunhomin"

'Let's forget the duck de la margola and order something else!' (man seeing duck fleeing from cook).

"You have to get up early tomorrow, too? We have so much in common!"

Tunnel of lurve

'When it comes to romance, Sherlock doesn't have a clue!'

"Oh, for butter curls on ice!"

"This is the last time I let anyone fix me up with a blind date!"

"Here's one - 'Few-bricks-short-of-a-load seeks One-our-out-of-the-water.'."

'What happens when your little sister misses her toy money?'

"So this is what we call a 'red flag'..."

"Some people think accountants are just boring number crunchers but statistics show that 43% of 456 people covering 56% of the total demographic were 67% sure that we're really a lot of fun!"

The Meeting: Day Four

'Let me just run through the offside rule.'

"Sorry - you're just not my type...!"

But enough about me, let's talk about my job.

'Something tells me we are NOT on the same page.'

"Your blind dates is at the bar - I'll upgrade you to a table by the getaway door."

'Can you suggest a wine to go with someone who's going to be hitting the road as soon as this date is over?'

"My mates at the showroom said that I should start dating again."

"Are you 'Athletic, bronzed male, early thirties seeking buxom, fun-loving younger female'?"

'No, everything is not all right. My date ran out without leaving money to pay the bill!'