Blind Date Survivor Pillows

'Okay, I admit the photo I sent you wasn't that recent, and I'm not really a male model. But everything else is true!'

'Your profile said you were tall, dark, and mysterious.'

A veteran of many horrific blind dates, Barb carried a copy of 'Fodor's Guide to Restaurant Back Doors' with her at all times.

"Your blind dates is at the bar - I'll upgrade you to a table by the getaway door."

'Your blind date reminded you of a TV star?, 'Yeah -- I think he was wearing Columbo's raincoat.'

'That's the last time I go on a blind date — her stupid seeing-eye dog bit me!'

"Our blind dates have spotted us, but it's going to be a while before we reach them: try to stay nonchalant all the way though..."

"Let me guess. My blind date couldn't make it, so he sent his Dad instead?"

"Alone bad. Boyfriend good!"

'He's narrating it, I just know it.'

"Wow! This was sure one heck of a blind date!"

'You and Phil make a great couple. You're perfect for each other!'

"Don't panic, she'll be back. We lock the washroom windows from the outside."

"Your profile said you were a dog."

"Monsieur has just ordered a vasectomy..."

"A high forhead can often be a sign that they've stolen a really big brain."

"You're not at all like your answering machine."

'Let's forget the duck de la margola and order something else!' (man seeing duck fleeing from cook).

'I don't believe in blind dates... the last time I got fixed up I got neutered.'

"On the internet nobody knows you're a dog, but in person..."

A Tree Grows In . . . Wherever.

"To be honest, I'm a little surprised the dating service matched us up."

"You have to get up early tomorrow, too? We have so much in common!"

"I guess I misunderstood when you said you were a 'fan dancer.'"

Tunnel of lurve

Gee, this is my lucky night. You see, when it comes to women, I'm not a leg man; I'm not a breast man; I'm a punctuation man. ! !

As luck would have it the hunchback's blind date turned out to be a hunchbelly!

"I've always been attracted to small architectural details."

"You know that on-line romance you've been carryin' on? Well this here's Samantha!"

Body language interpreters - "He likes you and wishes to dance with you." "That's a get lost."

Despite wanting to date a man who was 'young at heart', Beryl couldn't help but feel a little disappointed with her blind date.

'Aunt Val's pretty cool. . . Kind of hot actually. . . for an older lady.'

"So tell me again where you're from."

'You must be Olivia.'

'Yes, I did agree to a double date. However, taking two women out at the same time isn't what I expected!'