Boat Christening Gifts

'You'll have to excuse Pat; she hates to see champagne go to waste.'

'She's a very protectice mother!' - Lifeguard at Christening/Baptism.

"I said he's beginning to teethe...not tithe."

'Don't be silly- of course you're going into the family business!'

Early Piety

Two fishermen land on stumps. Man says to other, 'Is that enough structure for ya?!'

The rain has been falling for so long the animals are pairing up and forming queues by the boat! It must be time for the Crick boat show...

Baby Playing Violin

'Cheryl, you are getting way too wrapped up in the dog.'

'And you're sure you handed the baby to me?'

"What kind of sinker are you using?!"

"Call him Koffee- he keeps us awake!"

Baptism Then and Now

"Let me know if you smell any large-mouth bass."

'Captain, there's someone pissing in the hold!'

A baby being christened in a scuba mask.

"They have to clean her up before they show her to God."

"We bring him gifts of gold, frankincense and mercantile mutual hedge fund options."

'Charles Frederick and Camilla Gladys!'

"Sinead?!"

'Hey, you little punks wouldn't be trying to swamp me, would you?'

". . . and what is the user name of this child?"

"When you said we were going to push the boat out tonight, I thought you meant we were going to a fancy restaurant!"

"We're callin' 'im Bill, coz he came at the end of the month"

The Christening Party

"Yo! You check the pH lately? I have sensitive eyes, ya know."

'It's a nice font but before deciding we'd really like to see your font library.'

Baptism - "Actually he's quite looking forward to it."

'We'd like to christen him 2GR4T7VXS35. That way it'll be easier for him to get his own web domain name when he's older.'

'You're talking three million, ballpark

Tug Of War

Testing the water temperature in the font.

"Just a moment, please. I would like my mother's maiden name included."