New Boat Christening Gifts

"I've been sentenced to christen a ship."

'She's a very protectice mother!' - Lifeguard at Christening/Baptism.

"I said he's beginning to teethe...not tithe."

'Don't be silly- of course you're going into the family business!'

Early Piety

Two fishermen land on stumps. Man says to other, 'Is that enough structure for ya?!'

The rain has been falling for so long the animals are pairing up and forming queues by the boat! It must be time for the Crick boat show...

Baby Playing Violin

Lighthouse Beam.

'Cheryl, you are getting way too wrapped up in the dog.'

'And you're sure you handed the baby to me?'

"Call him Koffee- he keeps us awake!"

Baptism Then and Now

"We bring him gifts of gold, frankincense and mercantile mutual hedge fund options."

"They have to clean her up before they show her to God."

A baby being christened in a scuba mask.

'Captain, there's someone pissing in the hold!'

"Sinead?!"

'Charles Frederick and Camilla Gladys!'

". . . and what is the user name of this child?"

"We're callin' 'im Bill, coz he came at the end of the month"

The Christening Party

"Yo! You check the pH lately? I have sensitive eyes, ya know."

'It's a nice font but before deciding we'd really like to see your font library.'

'You're talking three million, ballpark

'We'd like to christen him 2GR4T7VXS35. That way it'll be easier for him to get his own web domain name when he's older.'

Baptism - "Actually he's quite looking forward to it."

'This is your idea of converting your boat to a sailboat, a sheet? And while we're on the topic, is that one of my good sheets?'

Captain Eddie's New Boat: 'Don't over-think it, just go with the moment...ok, maybe a little thinking...'

Testing the water temperature in the font.

"Just a moment, please. I would like my mother's maiden name included."

Peace Negotiator now available for Weddings, Funerals, Christenings, Barmitzvah

"Ha ha! Too late!"