New Boat Gifts

'They're sure not making Champagne bottles the way they used to.'

"I name this ship Moet et Chandon."

Lighthouse Beam.

'So what's it like riding in first class?'

"I think I've figured out why we can't find the marina."

"Do you mind?"

Build a Raft

Problem Solving: Man rows desert island to land.

'Could you wear this? You're scaring away the fish.'

"G.P.S. FOR GUYS"

"Settle down boy, they're not actual cat-fish."

Loud mouth bass.

Rabies on board - a couple of rabid babies.

Gone Bookkeepin'

'I told my wife she had to choose between me and that precious boat of her's. She called my bluff. Can I sleep on your couch?'

'I'm glad to see you've started building a boat.'

'It was this big. I swear'

"Build it 300 cubits long? I thought you said centimetres!"

"Any nibbles yet, hon?"

"I told you we'd be better off taking Canal."

A large yacht carries a small wood house.

'How long have you operated multi-engines, sailor?'

'I thought I knew what a cubit was.'

Give up all my possessions? Did I say Buddhist? I meant Boatist. I'm a boatist.

'Cap'n Ahab, Sir! Starbuck wants to know if you fancy a coffee.'

"You need to make room for the dirty laundry."

"Honestly, sweetheart, they haven't brought out a little Ellen MacArthur set. As soon as they do daddy will get you one."

'If we took the boat out, it might get dirty or scratched. Can't we sit here for the next several hours and talk about why you accused me of being paranoid?'

Funnel of Love.

'Could you give us a push?'

'They learn fast, don't they?'

"What on earth were you thinking when you named your boat?"

'George,why don't you break down and buy a fish finder?'

"Cool, Dad. When did you get a motor for the raft?"

The Sea Anglers: There is a warm feeling of brotherhood among all those who love messing about in boats...