New Boat T-Shirts

'They're sure not making Champagne bottles the way they used to.'

Lighthouse Beam.

'So what's it like riding in first class?'

"I think I've figured out why we can't find the marina."

Build a Raft

Problem Solving: Man rows desert island to land.

'Could you wear this? You're scaring away the fish.'

"G.P.S. FOR GUYS"

Loud mouth bass.

"Settle down boy, they're not actual cat-fish."

Rabies on board - a couple of rabid babies.

Gone Bookkeepin'

"I told you we'd be better off taking Canal."

'How long have you operated multi-engines, sailor?'

A large yacht carries a small wood house.

'It was this big. I swear'

'I told my wife she had to choose between me and that precious boat of her's. She called my bluff. Can I sleep on your couch?'

"Build it 300 cubits long? I thought you said centimetres!"

"Any nibbles yet, hon?"

'I'm glad to see you've started building a boat.'

'I thought I knew what a cubit was.'

'Cap'n Ahab, Sir! Starbuck wants to know if you fancy a coffee.'

Give up all my possessions? Did I say Buddhist? I meant Boatist. I'm a boatist.

"Honestly, sweetheart, they haven't brought out a little Ellen MacArthur set. As soon as they do daddy will get you one."

'If we took the boat out, it might get dirty or scratched. Can't we sit here for the next several hours and talk about why you accused me of being paranoid?'

'Could you give us a push?'

'They learn fast, don't they?'

'George,why don't you break down and buy a fish finder?'

The Sea Anglers: There is a warm feeling of brotherhood among all those who love messing about in boats...

Cat on Board.

"What on earth were you thinking when you named your boat?"

"Cool, Dad. When did you get a motor for the raft?"

My First Boat

'This is my new boat. I finally succumbed to pier pressure.'