Blueprint Enthusiast Gifts

"Millimetres or centimetres? Check the plan."

'The project is a little behind schedule. It was proactive, now it's retroactive.'

'Frankly, I prefer the monkey's plans.'

"Whatever the heck it is, it was built exactly to specifications."

'Bill, you messed up again. You built the second floor on top of the third floor.'

"The tops are always the tricky bit."

"It's meant to be a high rise... you've got the plans upside down."

'Oh no, a few more change orders from Mrs. Fergenson, right?'

"Great design, but, when the time comes, a bitch to implode."

"It's going well so far."

"Are you sure you used the correct scale?"

"I like it, Eiffel. Maybe a tad taller though?"

Architect chained to his drawing of parliament

The computer program made it look a lot bigger.

"His architectural drawings are out of this world."

Architect

"You see? You gotta turn it counter-clockwise."

Worker takes Boss out in a wheelbarrow

"And make sure the walls aren't built to scale."

Builder follows an architect's blueprints exactly, including the smudges.

'This shows where the swimming pool will be placed.'

'Who needs central heating? I've got plenty of vintage port?'

Building site. 'Going to be a new tv station.'

'You have 90 days to fix the problem, or we'll fix it, and mail you the bill!'

Cubits? Haven't You gone metric yet?

We're putting on a subtraction.

"We only got six days of funding."

"This the first time you guys ever installed an above-ground pool?"

'I don't care what the blueprints say, I'm certain HE strongly suggested a roof.'

Deadline

"Here's the parking lot."

Five Ideas For Success: Always finish what you. . .

"This is just a model, but you get the idea."

"Whether we refer to them as lakes or ponds, it's mere semantics."

"And nobody noticed the crease in the blueprint?"