Blend Enthusiast T-Shirts

'I like to puree before I crunch the numbers.'

Every time you make a blend, somewhere, a wine maker dies.

'I put the cake in the blender because I wanted a glass of cake.'

"We have three house blends: 'One More Chance', 'Forget About It' or 'I'll See You In Fun Court'."

Blend Schools

"I'm looking for something that says country-but-only-an-hour-and-a-half-drive-from-the-city."

"I'm just not in an Australian-movie mood, O.K.?"

Motor-blender.

"No, I did NOT get the memo about "Casual Fridays." Had I known I would have worn flats."

Give Thanks.

"My trick for enjoying kale? I put in blueberries, a banana, a scoop of vanilla ice cream and ice. Then I throw the kale in the trash and blend."

'Well, it's just like they say, Fred. When all you have is a laser-driven plasma cathode injector, everything looks like an inertial confinement fusion experiment.'

Man Reaches For The Puree Button On The Elevator

'I don't 'do' chewing!'

'You did it! You changed my lovely witches broom into a hybrid!!'

"I love the smell of lip balm in the morning."

"I guess I thought 'Andy and the blenders' was a band."

Bananas eye the blender

Preparing to paint an un-still life.

'...So it's an orange orange Roughy smoothie?'

'Ok, I came up with a new name for my invention. Now it's called the cyclone cylinder!'

"And remember, dear, at midnight it turns back into an Uber."

'I always wanted to be a genre, but I'm worried I've become a cliche.'

'Guess what, Mom - Suzie and I just found out that we have the same ex-Dad!'

'Now you tell me the blender has a lid!'

Books - As Seen on TV.

Multimarriages-phobia.

The Original Good Cup of Coffee...

'Be careful near the jungle jim.'

'Bud just can't take much sun; he has such a delicate skin.'

'So this is what you do while I'm away.'

Nice try, Jim, but there no such thing as a "beer cleanse."

Ficken or Chish?

Kyleen's SPF 5000 Beach Umbrella helps her avoid skin cancer.

Spiro & Pusho and the palm tree.