Blackboard Enthusiasts Gifts

Math 101, for those who can only count to 100.

"Hoskins, try saying 'profits are up' without the finger quotes, okay?"

"Great plan. Could we get some more details?"

'If your calculations are correct, this completely revolutionizes everything we thought we knew about why chalk squeaks on a blackboard!'

'Now this is exactly what I was referring to when I talked about 'scope creep'.'

'OOO, I've thought of a new one! Two squiggles and a backwards G!'

"I will now fend off questions from the audience."

'My name is Jeremy and I approved this message.'

'I know it's controversial, but my calculations prove beyond doubt that a nod is BETTER than a wink.'

“Today we are going to be learning percentages.”

'There's no delete key. You have to use the board eraser.'

Around here it got a little tricky...

As a matter of fact, it IS rocket science.

Thank You, Goals Achieved... and then some!

'It's a foolproof formula for writing grant applications.'

'Eureka! After months of research and formulating algorithms, I've done it... I've discovered the secret to 'being cool'!'

I will not waste chalk kid...

'Very impressive, Newcombe. Over at Liberal Arts we still have trouble with the multiplication table.'

"It's a clear case of RLS: Repetitive Lecture Syndrome."

'That's from the last year the data was available.'

Company take-over bid

"All power to the board of directors!"

"Is that it? Is that the Grand Unified Theory?"

'Well, it looks like the 'yea' has it.'

"What sort of a Mall is this anyway?"

"To be honest, it was a matter of finding something to do after I gave up alcohol."

Skateboarding

"That's the finest vacuum cleaner you've ever designed."

Teacher with wing-mirror on blackboard.

"As an efficiency expert I can with great certainty point to one inescapable fact. You guys aren't."

'...And now a word from our sponsors...'