Birdwatcher Humor Gifts

"I swear...I have no idea!"

"We'll have three deluxe wormburgers and a big bucket of regurgi-taters."

"Can we not fly in a "V"? Victor broke up with me."

Let's try to flip this house before we fly back up North.

Cat Tries to Catch a Bird.

"Yeah, I got the whole trip on frequent flyer points!"

Once Henry saw that his usual 'Mating Dance' moves weren't working, he decided to go 'Gangnam Style.'

"Well, this anti-aging cream clearly states it removes crow's feet."

"Honey, you're spoiling that child."

'According to the weight chart, if you were a condor, you'd have a wingspan of 97 feet.'

"Sometimes, plastic in the ocean isn't bad... Ooh, that bottle cap will make a lovely bowl for Ed and Nicole!"

I think it's time he left home.'

Cuckoo has got halfway through it's call and then had an arrow shot at it.

New York Scatological Society

"We can do this the easy way or the Hitchcockian way."

"At the time I thought it was a goose."

"Hiya, hiya, hiya, guy. I'm the bluebird of Prozac."

Tom, you may not want to pause so long at the top of your swing.

"I'm the bluebird of PMS. Fetch me some decaf and turn on the air conditioner. I'm burning up in here!"

'You are pigeon toed.'

A couple of birds out on the town.

Signs reads 'Do Not Feed the Boids.'

"You want the lead role in the Thanksgiving play, don't you? Try again, 'Gobble, gobble, gobble' - this time with feeling!"

"My landing gear won't come down. I have a cramp."

"Now, son, hitting a car is all about timing. You'll want to release about here..."

"Well, that backfired."

"I don't know what happened - he was such a good egg."

'Hup, two, three, four! Hup, two, three, four!'

'Sure I can do same day service.'

"He's a bird-dog."

Closed for Summer.

"For goodness sake, Wilf, trim your eyebrows -- they think you're one of them!"

'Why can't I ever lead?'

Two ducks in restaurant, one without a beak, "Can I get my bill, please?"

Artist Hazards