Bird Documentary Devotee Gifts

Birdwatchers watching a bird documentary.

"We just haven't been flapping them hard enough."

"It was years ago, for a nature documentary, and they said it was going to be very artistic."

"If we only repeat what humans say whenever they're nearby... they won't realize we're aliens plotting to take over the planet."

'I was told you two have a love-hate relationship. Care to elaborate on that?'

French Early Bird

"No need for stage fright, it's just a documentary crew: be yourself..."

'Phoor...watch these sperm whales at it...ah...yes..yes...'

"Those pervs from the nature channel are filming us again."

Steve Irwin.

"What can you possibly expect from my client, your honor? He's a wolf!"

The male of the species approaches the cafe counter. What's that, Mr. Pinkerton? Careful not to disturb those around him, the male scans his surroundings. His senses, his vision and his sense of smell have been honed by years of evolution and survival. Sniiif! At last, the male makes his move! He orders one slice of rhubarb pie, a la mode! You want pie? Suddenly, he is alerted to danger. The male seeks refuge behind a petunia! … but is it too late? No pie for him. The male will have a salad. The

'You've killed four warthogs, nine antelopes, two buffaloes and six gnus, but you haven't killed any zebras! Well, I call that discrimination!'

'She hunts, she brings it back, and my manhood,thank goodness, remains intact.'

Conducting the crows.

'I love show biz!'

"Now will you knock it off with all the bird calls?"

Field guide to North American plumbers

'He's been sleeping up there ever since he saw that 'Jaguars' program on the nature channel.'

"Hold on, you can't attack her! Can't you see she's pregnant!"

"We'll have whatever they are at the next table."

'Ambushing them is a great idea: I usually tend to charge blindly...'

Reintroducing wolves to the wild.

Closed for Summer.

'Whoa! You're right - they DO shed their skins!'

"Your cholesterol level is through the roof!! When you die, may I hang you up in my garden for the blue tits..?"

Smirking hyena.

What's on? A duckumentary.

Salmon jumping up waterfall on film

"I'm weighing the risk of brain damage against a life of celibacy."

Happy Birthday, Bimba

Lions try reverse psychology: 'Zebras taste yukky! 'And these are way too boney!'

Scientist taking air quality reading on roof with canary wearing gas mask.

Bates Motel Birdhouse

...and now Blue Planet two...