Bill Counter Gifts

'It's a bill for asking how much I charge.'

"We're pleased to announce that your company has shrewdly traded a cow for some magic beans." some ma

"O.K. he's a billionaire, but how much of it is in cash?"

"These are magic beans, my boy. Their value comes from growth and scale, not revenue."

'The employee who guesses closest to the correct number of beans in this jar will be awarded this year's annual pay increase! -Management, ATOZ Accountants

Company profit making scheme - Jenkins, you owe us £327.95.

"Mother, I sold the cow for some financial derivatives."

"Our accountancy firm says that there are a number of ways to interpret the figures... which one do you prefer?"

"You have $3,098 in the bank? I'm impressed! So...do you think about investing it?"

"I LOVE you more than old people love to pay for everything in exact change."

Do you want this set of books, or the set you keep in the broom cupboard?

'I've added this up six times and still can't get it to balance!'

"She's passed out...quick! take her pulses!"

'I wish you'd put the heater back on Frank! Even the wall ducks have gone somewhere warmer!'

C.P.A.

Entry level astronomer...

'Stocks rose on news engineers are close to developing a car that runs on lattes!'

"The first bill is always a shock-everyone thinks Heaven will be free."

"These here accountants should be ready just in time for tax season."

Caveman turning the wheel into a bar.

Stocktaker counts contents of baked-bean tins.

Tax - Random Audit

"I'm sorry, Sam, but all of this doesn't add up to a hill of beans."

'A boat in every garage, a limit of fish in every creel!'

"I think it's just human nature to set up a private special purpose business entity to conceal balance sheet transaction in order to maximize an earnings forecast."

'I bet he can run twice as fast as you can.' 'But he has twice as many legs!'

'Is it safe to come out? Are the auditors gone?'

Annual sleep disorder for tax accountants.

I'd like to investigate your tax return!

"You can't lend me the £100 I asked for, only £70? Don't worry, you can own me the rest."

'Poor me. . . pour me a drink!'

'50 of the population spends more than they earn. That's where we come in.'