Biker Buff Gifts

'Thank you for sharing the squeegee.'

'What flock of birds, Henry'

"First aid box, puncture repair kit, mobile phone, energy bars and plenty of liquids; I think that's all eventualities covered..."

'It's perfectly normal for middle-aged men to put on a little weight.'

Man with 'Real Ale' written on t-shirt, woman with 'Real Pine' written on rolling pin

It's our new twin-handle beer mug. It's for manly, two-fisted drinkers, as well as weaklings like you who can't lift it with one hand.

Ask not for whom happy hour ends. It ends for thee.

Are laboratory grown foods the future of farming?

'Can I have flies with that'

Surreal ale

Brew 'N' Brouhaha

A cow goes to the Fortune Teller - 'I can see two all beef patties, special sauce, lettuce, cheese, pickles, onions, on a sesame seed bun...!'

'C'mon, c'mon! I want to be the first one on the stair-climbing machine!'

"It's from the local micro brewery..."

"I worked hard, I played hard and I embezzled hard."

'He's a yodelling busker!'(Busker on faraway mountain).

'It's supposed to look and smell greasy.'

'I think I've found what's been causing my funny buzzing sounds.'

'And I say he makes us look bad when he rides around listening to those books.'

'By the looks of these skid marks, Humpty didn't fall- he was pushed!'

'I'll have one regular cheese-burger from column 'A', and one negative-calories cheese-burger from column 'B'.'

'He's made an eco-friendly bamboo bike... unfortunately all the tomato plants have fallen down.'

"When did everybody stop jogging?"

'He's got a good attitude, and he's tall. But he's got to get into the weight room.'

Big Boy Foot

Fitness Course.

"Looks like he's been salted, Sarge.2

'It's just what I always wanted!'

'You are talking about health? Ha! My cig does not have calories, fat, cholesterol, carbohydrates and sugar!'

"You can lie to the prosecutor but don't ever lie to your co-conspirators."

"In my workout this morning I hit a new personal best, but on a seasonally adjusted basis, my numbers actually fell."

'You've taken that handlebar mustache too far.'

"Steroids."

Old School Mustaches

Black market trade in foodstuffs is thriving.