Biblical Phrase Fan Gifts

The meek shall inherit the earth - whatever's left of it.

Campaign for Plain English

"We're following Carrot Top."

William Shakespeare sitting at a desk

Ghostwriting the Bible

'It's not for myself, you understand."

''Raining cats and dogs' is just a phrase, Alix.'

'No room at the inn, baby born in a manger: It's gonna be a great story to tell at parties...'

The Da Vinci Cod

"He wasn't even early - he was on his way home from a party!"

You're my Venus

"No, this is NOT a beta-test!"

"A wise choice sir! Aah. . . Da Vinci - a genius of the Renaissance and a man who changed the face of art forever! Would you like that as a bookmark, a pencil sharpener or a fridge magnet. . . ?"

"Wow, what a DILF."

"Oh look Pharaoh a miniature replica of your final resting place."

"When we asked you to paint the ceiling of the Sistine Chapel, Michaelangelo, we were hoping you'd snazz it up."

Ancient Grammar Police: 'Oh, for cryin' out loud...you never end a sentence with a . . .'

Rembrandt's Selfies

Your basket: Gold. . .You may also like: Frankincense and Myrrh.

"Nice job, but there in the middle, I think you spelled Akhenaten wrong."

Atlasyphus.

"Another selfie, Rembrandt?"

"I've got dominion, I've got dominion..."

"I'm not loitering officer, I 'm waiting for the next renaissance!"

First O.M.G. church.

Spaghetti Mummy

'Bone appetit!'

"It's funny. . . I know it's the renaissance, but I keep writing dark ages on my checks!"

Lost to antiquity.

'Damn copier broke down again!'

Pearls Before Swine is not a terribly savvy name

"I can't see it lasting!"

Thomas Wyatt

At home with the pedants "It's raining small carnivorous quadrupedes" "Both feline and canine?"

The curse of the Ancient Egyptians, Andrex puppies