Bible Story Recounter Gifts

'Adam was okay, but I'd like the next project to be more user-friendly.'

"Maybe the next one will be a singles cruise."

"Well, isn't that embarrassing."

I was holding out okay, until he made it into crumb cake.

Moses separating his Laundry.

"I think I've figured out why we can't find the marina."

"Eat not of the fruit of the Tree of Knowledge. Its sources have yet to be verified."

'Wow! -- Talk about a paradigm shift!'

'Yes, all at once!'

'I was hoping you'd sign them 'To my good buddy Moses!''

'Tell us the story of Moses again -- I like the chase scene!'

No, no, this is Terry's ark, Noah's is three arks down.

'Why me Lord?' '...because yo have animal magnetism Noah...'

"It's cool – God told us to!"

"I've told you before one at each end!"

"Could you all please pay attention while I go through the emergency procedure. . ."

"Hang on, isn't this the second pair of zebras we've had today?"

"O Lord—why art thou such a drama queen?"

'I don't care what the blueprints say, I'm certain HE strongly suggested a roof.'

"Why did we run out of wine?! I'll tell you why...Mary's son brought 12 of his friends who crashed the wedding party! That's why!"

"It's the Environment's Agency's new H.Q."

"What? You broke number 3 already?"

Teaching a Sunday school class didn't end the way John imagined.

'You were great at 'Daniel in the Lion's Den!' -- I'd sure like to hear you do 'The Three Little Pigs' sometime!'

"We have plenty of time to catch the ark."

Little Known Moments In History

"If you think you made a stink pulling the fruit, try pulling His finger."

Noah's life jacket demonstration

Adam and Eve toast next to a serpent bartender.

'Gosh, I dunno. You sure it's organic?'

Noah's Ark/Single's Cruise

"Hurry! Let's go! The world will be better off without his kind."

"Boss, you can't be serious! This can't be paradise. . . there's no football and no pubs!"

"Still, you've got to admit our being swallowed by a fish has its humorous aspects!"

"Will you stop telling me to feed the Zebras? We just ate the zebras!"