Benefit Connoisseur Gifts

"Campus lockdown 2020-21: Studied Net Flix, takeaway menu apps, and future benefit entitlements."

"Stock options for your thoughts."

Atlas with the earth, says: 'So then I thought, Why not just roll the damn thing?'

S**t Threw a Goose

Man frozen in portrait pose.

Moliere

"Most of my consumerism is self-taught."

C Day Lewis.

Charles Dickens.

Bleak House

" . . . and white, not yellow. Block, not shredded. Aged, but not too aged that it doesn't slice well."

Weinberg's egregious error would damage his reputation forever, His colleagues would thereafter refer to him as 'the big double dipper,

'...and to commemorate 20 loyal years to the company, this gold plated sundial.'

"What am I, chopped liver?"

"We only shop brick and mortar because my husband likes to be disgruntled face-to-face when returning things."

'The position carries no salary but does provide for full medical and dental coverage, with three weeks vacation.'

'I don't need your love. I need a 401 (k) and health insurance.'

'Your baseball card has more value than you do.'

"I gave him 'the old one two' just like you told me to. But then he gave me 'the old three four'."

The 'I'm Almost Finished With War And Peace' Bookmark

When feud becomes best seller! Moby Dick vs Herman Melville!

Sergei Rachmaninov

"Don't worry, she's still alcohol aware."

"Oh, I was looking for something with a little more hay."

Employee Benefits

"Look, I know you think you've got the stuff, but I'm telling you: walk God."

'With 13 holidays per year, 2 weeks sick leave, 2 coffee break each day, 4 weeks vacation a year, 80% of ife and health insurance, profit sharing, including various discounts and you still want a salary?'

"What kind of moviemaking do we want to reinforce?"

"I don't know - none of these cookies offer an engaging brand narrative."

"If you want to spend a little more, here's one that comes with a trust fund."

"Fixed-term contracts, social benefits, pension plans, health insurance. . . we have nothing to complain about. And that's why we're on strike!"

'New! A bonus island of flavor!'

'Let me get this straight: The job comes with a full health care package? Including a dental plan? Impressive! What kind of salary are we talking?'

"You should feel honoured. I don't sue anyone."

"Nice abs!"