Belief Debaters Gifts

'The problem with that is that it makes you an easy target.'

"Trust me Jesus, if you want to make a bigger impact work on being seeker friendly."

"Intelligent design...well, duh!"

"How was I supposed to know that the apple was a controlled substance?"

Changing Minds

'You'll never believe this - they've found the actual body of Jesus!'

"I wonder how many people are claiming to be your messiah right now?"

"Mr. Pope, please give this summons to your boss. The prosecutor wants to know how god can allow so much misery."

"You atheists wouldn't exist without God!"

"You say we atheists are going to Hell? Look at all the f**ks we give... Go ahead... Look at them all."

"But, Jesus - you can't become an atheist."

The only Universal Truths that all religions agree upon.

"I'm starting to prefer the ones who don't believe in me."

Today's sermon: 'Do sin taxes violate the seperation of church & state?'

With Liberty handcuffed,,the thought police pursue happiness,

Corruption trial in the Vatican

"I think you made your mistake right at the beginning!"

'I used to think I couldn't serve both God and Mammon, and then I discovered multitasking!'

Atheist Convention: 'I don't believe it!'

'So, I take it that diversity isn't a priority?'

"And lo, we made God in our own image.."

"Well, son, in a way, I suppose Jesus was a trust-fund baby."

'Doesn't this 'chosen people' thing sound a little nepotistic?'

Actual Results May Vary

"Hey, this is a good bit- did I say that?"

'What did you say? 'The light is nothing but an ordinary streetlamp'? Oh no! My own son is an atheist??!'

"Even Voldemort wouldn't drown a whole planet."

Basic Theology

"Well...this constant badness is just sooo wearisome...."