Theology Debaters Gifts

"So, were you nervous when you met the Pope?"

"Yesterday, militant atheists killed moderate atheists for not being atheist enough."

"So what if Jesus was sent here to suffer and die... We all do that."

"Trust me Jesus, if you want to make a bigger impact work on being seeker friendly."

"Intelligent design...well, duh!"

'A religious zealot denounces a toaster for working on the Sabbath'

'You'll never believe this - they've found the actual body of Jesus!'

"How was I supposed to know that the apple was a controlled substance?"

"I think you refuse to admit your god condones slavery, because doing so would be an admission you are more moral than he is. And that conflicts with your Borg programming."

"I wonder how many people are claiming to be your messiah right now?"

"You atheists wouldn't exist without God!"

"Mr. Pope, please give this summons to your boss. The prosecutor wants to know how god can allow so much misery."

"You say we atheists are going to Hell? Look at all the f**ks we give... Go ahead... Look at them all."

Needless to say, God forgot the legs.

The only Universal Truths that all religions agree upon.

"This'll show the Theology Department."

"I'm starting to prefer the ones who don't believe in me."

Today's sermon: 'Do sin taxes violate the seperation of church & state?'

Worst. God. Ever.

Corruption trial in the Vatican

"I think you made your mistake right at the beginning!"

'I used to think I couldn't serve both God and Mammon, and then I discovered multitasking!'

Atheist Convention: 'I don't believe it!'

'So, I take it that diversity isn't a priority?'

I hear you're preaching godlessness, you little heathen. I'm preaching intellectual honesty. There is no proof of a Judeo Christian almighty. You might as well believe in Zeus or the spiritual powers of a raisin scone. Where do you think morality comes from? What do you think is the basis for our civil society? The almighty! All hail the raisin scone! HOJ.

"And lo, we made God in our own image.."

Equal Time for All Christians

"Well, son, in a way, I suppose Jesus was a trust-fund baby."

'Doesn't this 'chosen people' thing sound a little nepotistic?'

"Can atheists refuse to participate?"

Actual Results May Vary

"Hey, this is a good bit- did I say that?"

'What did you say? 'The light is nothing but an ordinary streetlamp'? Oh no! My own son is an atheist??!'

Woman protesting to Free-Kirk pastor about a church organ

Liberals Ignore Science Too