Beginning University Gifts

Geek in indignation at fellow geek's T-shirt which says: 'I'm with someone who can only recite pi to 100 decimal places.'

"And the last little piggy cried, 'Oui, oui, oui' all the way home."

'Reading, writing and arithmetic are important, son. Someday you might sign autographs for money.'

"Did I hear the dog in here?"

'Peter the Flying Hippo is my favorite storybook character without any merchandising tie-ins.'

"I've always dreamed of being on an academic team like this! It's great that we can all depend on each other!"

'When I grow up, I want to be a hydraulic engineer...'

Big Bang Theory.

'Hmph. College kids.'

'My reading comprehension is so-so, but I do make up for it with my highlighting skills.'

'But I digress...'

"When I grow up, I'm writing the Great American App."

"I got a gold star for going the longest without looking at my phone in class."

'Does this have anything to do with Einstein's theory of relativity?'

"My answers could be right. Your quiz just asked the wrong questions."

'It's rather unorthodox, but it appears the deposit refund on the empties will cover your first interest payment.'

College. Did you pick a major yet? I'm doing a double major in art and logic --- I want to draw my own conclusions!

"I didn't finish the proof but I did write this poem about my struggle."

"There's something weird about Emily. She actually likes school!"

"Abstract Expressionism is definitely right for me at this stage of my career."

"It's no my fault I got a D. The system is broken."

'In school today, we learned about endangered species.'

'I couldn't do my term paper because they've never made a movie about Rutherford B. Hayes.'

'X is unknown? Even to somebody with all your education?'

Being and Nothingness Pop-Up! (book)

Boy and girl at thier studies

'What a drive! Our boy's going to go a long, long way.'

Kid in time-out writes 'it was the best of time out...'

Girl with smart phone enters door that says "Social Media Studies"

'Are you sure I should read my book report to the class? --�It's PG-13.'

Culture Saturday

'My imaginary playmate can whip your imaginary playmate!'

"I'll bet all of Albert Einstein's teachers felt like idiots for giving him bad grades too."

'The secret to doing a book report is only picking books that have been made in to movies.'

'Desert island cartoons - and you?'