Beef Farmer Gifts

"At this time, we would like to welcome all platinum priority members to board."

'Soy milk, soy burgers...imagine being replaced by a bean.'

"My smelly French cheese is much better than your Canadian beef."

"Roooad trip!"

'Well Alice. Now do you know what cull means?'

"Leave me alone. I'm resting my steak."

Pizza-Fed Beef

"The good news is everyone in the world is now vegan. That's also the bad news."

"It's official"..."It's a drought!"

Prize vegetables.

"The good old days of eating the washing off the line are all gone methinks: The farmer has bought an electric dryer..."

'Keep me informed of the herds' mood.'

"A wet winter, but we're making the best of it."

It's a Whole Field of Paisley!

International Women's Day.

12 O'clock was 'I'm a tractor time.'

'Enjoy your meal! We grow everything ourselves!'

"If you ask me, wearing these things only makes them nervous."

Humans...What is their purpose?

"No, I like the plan. Just saying, have you ever done any actual tunnelling?"

'Little Yank' Calf Puller.

Chase me, chase me cows.

'The circle is complete!'

"I'm not having it if it's been genetically modified."

Cow's Last Will and Testament.

A sheep dog has stacked the sheep four high - 'He used to be with the circus before he came to the farm...!'

'Have you tried pulling the udders?'

'Hi, Doc! I don't think I'm going to need you after all....'

Cow Pinatas

The Endless Battle of the Organic Gardener

'Cow in love'

"You said the cauliflower is locally grown – would you elaborate?"

'It's not easy being green on grass!'

A cat has caught a cow which it is dragging through it's cat flap.

The Rooster Comedian.