Becoming A Dad Gifts

Parental Anxiety

'I need some tech support here!'

'Look at big woosy Sid, pushing his pram with two hands!'

D-Day (Dad Day)

Father nursing his sick child

"Oh, but it's not okay for me to practices being a parent?"

"Which one is yours?"

Believe it or not: Once upon a time Dads couldn't even boil water.

Baby in Bike Basket

Food deliverer's baby.

"Wouldn't it be easier to let me fall asleep in front of the TV like dad?"

"Which end does the diaper go on 'cause there's stuff comin' out of both of 'em!"

'3 hamburgers, 2 servings of fries, 1 vanilla shake...'

'Let's hit the road, son! We are Baby Bjorn to be wild!'

"Jim was a model Dad".

L'il Buckaroo.

L'il Buckaroo on Board.

"How long before I have a dad body?"

"So last Christmas it was those Cabbage Patch Kids."

Dad Trophies

Maternity.

Ok, you were right. The Sumo diaper was a bad idea.

"You really shouldn't ask for material things like a bike. At least try for a Porsche."

"Relax, Dad... I'll put your toothbrush away when I'm done. I always do."

"Please let go of Daddy's chest hair."

"Are you insane?!" The Velveteen Skunk

Domestic Superheroes!!

"His first out-of-body experience."

Mum and baby both have pacifier.

'I stay trim because of high metabolism. Theirs, not mine.'

"This is a great spot to practice mighty roars son..."

"Frankly, now that he's an obnoxious teenager, I find it more and more difficult to muster the urge to protect him..."

Batman at the Maternity Ward

You can't just switch them. If your wife asked you to change the baby, she probably meant the diaper.

"I can't protect you from everything, but I can read you stories that make you believe I can protect you from everything."