Becoming A Big Brother Gifts

Little doctor.

To my future King.

'Someday, all this will be yours.'

Looking Forward.

'My imaginary playmate can whip your imaginary playmate!'

'How'd you get out of time-out??. . . Dude, if you do the crime, you do the time.'

A man playing with a baby

Young Frank Lloyd Wright

"Did I hear the dog in here?"

'It's rather unorthodox, but it appears the deposit refund on the empties will cover your first interest payment.'

'They don't understand goo-goo-gah-gah. Dumb it down to WHAAAAAH!'

'You gotta learn to talk, Jeffrey -- it's part of the aging process.'

"First I drink, then I barbecue — that's my secret."

'No hair or teeth, can't walk or talk -- he's kind of a starter kit.'

'So far I've found out the doctor had something to do with it.'

'Mom! -- Jeffrey's having a wardrobe malfunction!'

"Have you met my bodyguard?"

Changes at home

"At home there's a fish, a cat, a dog, me, and a big sister."

It's my biggest project - a database of all my sister's boyfriends.

'At midnight, we go over the wall.'

Toys

"Little Lucas doesn't go anywhere without his weighted blanket."

Maternity ward: 'Oh boy - stereo!'

'Maggots.' - playing doctor

'A baby brother? — I'm not ready to make a commitment like that!'

'Is that IT? All this way for just the ONE?'

Two boys eating ice cream

"It's easy to understand the theory of evolution when you have a brother!"

"Go to sleep, or she'll sing it again."

Swinging on the Chandelier

"Think about it: Toby's the only ram here, so we have to be half brothers!"

'No hair or teeth, can't walk or talk -- she's kind of a starter kit.'

"I don’t see how confirming who I like best will help this situation."

His real name is Jasper Underwood Farthington III...but we just call him 'Stinky'.