Beast Enthusiast Gifts

Happy Birthday: Simply the Beast

"We found the poor thing stranded on the beach last summer and decided to adopt it."

The Ray Bradbury classic, 'The Car Alarm.'

The Zoo.

'It's a deal, lets sniff bottoms!'

"He was overly socialized as a puppy."

Seagiraffes

A baby duck in a tiny car seat on the mother duck's back.

Meet Stephen Krkzk Author of 'Why Conspiracy Theories Are Nonsense'

"Well, isn't that embarrassing."

'Take a few days off. Suck some necks ...'

"You do realize I'm going to have to bill you for ten?"

'Dr Hodges, here, is from England and he's been observing us for 14 years. Mr Ferrell, an American, has been here only 3 weeks. Monique Corveu, from Paris, has practically been living with us for about nine years...'

"The Lord works in mysterious ways, I mean, alpacas? What are they? It’s like Bob Seger mated with a llama."

"I decided to go all out on the house decorations this year."

"You're very lucky that gazelle gives me diarrhea."

Pirate Squirrels Looking for Buried Treasure

'The problem is, she's so damn crabby.'

"The cat told me to eat your homework."

"...and your ears! They're like silk purses!"

Girl wags her pony tail as dog wags his tail.

Dead Funny

Boy with a whale: 'He followed me home, Dad, can I keep him?'

'You can't be serious! They wash you by dipping you in a tub of water! That's horrible!'

Unfinished painting of a monster in a lake sits beside the lake with no painter in sight

"First date hairball... awkward."

'Hang on a minute: What does 'IVF' mean?!'

Wolf trying on sheep's clothing at a retail store.

'Bloody favouritism I call it.'

The Trojan Beagle.

Cat in a flap

Endangered wildlife 'Lost' posters stuck on trees surrounded by rubbish