Beachside Leisure Gifts

Two women in a horse and buggy at the seaside.

"I said the males were 'evolving' – I didn't say they were 'maturing.'"

Woman uses a remote control to turn on the sunset.

"Business doesn't take a summer vacation."

"I'm from brokers without borders. Invest in deserted island reits!"

Bring your own inflatable.

'No, I'm not stranded. This is the only place I could find that has no distractions.'

'Look - a starfish, its manager, its agent, its minders, its significant other, its make-up artist, its personal trainer, its secretary, its astrologer, its feng shui consultant...'

"For heaven's sake, Ogden, it's vacation time! Must you make your little lists even on vacation time?"

Beach Barbecue

Scene of seagull troops about to charge a picnic.

"If you hold it to your ear you can hear the ice caps melting."

"This place is nice, but what would we really do if we lived here? Lie around and be happy all the time?"

"Apparently, when the tide came in, a lot of castles went bust."

"Now you can send it."

'He's going to be an estate agent, just like his Dad.'

"I only need shade for my wine."

There is no hurricane season in Aruba...

"For a normal sunset say 'one', for a romantic sunset say 'two', but first please give us your credit card details."

"Dude, I'm losing you in this tunnel."

Building giant sand pies.

"We're here to recharge our batteries."

"City kids."

"I said isn't it great to get away from it all."

How to cope in Los Angeles vs. New York

Dog brings diver flippers.

"I don't think anyone will notice your ninty seven pound lime green lycra swimming trunks Terry."

'Did you say psst?.'

"I said, 'I'm not on duty! I just came back to get my flip-flops.'"

"The moon, the dinner, dancing. How could this night be more perfect?"

"Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall, fell, and retained a brilliant attorney."

'Jen, you knew when you married me, I was a 'corporate report' reading person - Not a 'summer fiction' reading person.'

Man on beach realizes laying down flattens his stomach

Hollywood Breakup

'Relax, dude - I got your back.'