Beach Thrills Gifts

"The waves were great today."

Woman uses a remote control to turn on the sunset.

'Why couldn't you just give him a bucket and shovel?'

"I'm from brokers without borders. Invest in deserted island reits!"

Bring your own inflatable.

"I didn't know she could body surf. Did you know she could body surf?"

Beach Barbecue

'Look - a starfish, its manager, its agent, its minders, its significant other, its make-up artist, its personal trainer, its secretary, its astrologer, its feng shui consultant...'

"Eventually, you'll learn to hate your body, then love it again, then hate it—and back and forth until the beach becomes very complicated."

"If you hold it to your ear you can hear the ice caps melting."

"Apparently, when the tide came in, a lot of castles went bust."

Shellfie

'He's going to be an estate agent, just like his Dad.'

"For a normal sunset say 'one', for a romantic sunset say 'two', but first please give us your credit card details."

'This seashell does not sound like the ocean... It sounds like someone yelling 'Look out!''

"We're here to recharge our batteries."

Where cartoon characters go on holiday...

Segregated Beach

Brighton Bersagliere.

'Actually, most brides would find being stranded on a deserted beach very romantic...'

Sale on Bathing Suits, One Size Fits None.

Building giant sand pies.

S.P.F. 1,000

"City kids."

"I said isn't it great to get away from it all."

'Jen, you knew when you married me, I was a 'corporate report' reading person - Not a 'summer fiction' reading person.'

"The moon, the dinner, dancing. How could this night be more perfect?"

Mobsters at the Beach

'Did you say psst?.'

Sharks hate practical jokes.

Wish you were steer!

Dog brings diver flippers.

'Relax, dude - I got your back.'

"I don't think anyone will notice your ninty seven pound lime green lycra swimming trunks Terry."

Man on beach realizes laying down flattens his stomach