Beach Relaxation T-Shirts

'And as the sun sets over the hills.'

"Nation-building never works."

"Thor! I am Thor! Ha. Just kidding. I'm Tom the Seagull."

"Those aren't coconuts, they're tennis balls." "Sweet mother of Novak Djokovic!" The island of lost tennis balls.

Holiday time.

Winter Coat Check at a Tropical Destination's Airport

Beach con-man.

"Business doesn't take a summer vacation."

"Too crowded. Let's go."

Woman uses a remote control to turn on the sunset.

"Hawaii, where are you folks going?"

'Why couldn't you just give him a bucket and shovel?'

'Hold on just a few more minutes. I want mine medium well.'

"I know I'm a little early, but sometimes I need a break from that dreadfully cold weather."

'Thank-you God.'

Bring your own inflatable.

Viking on beach with rubber ring shaped like viking ship.

"If oceans are absorbing more carbon dioxide, why isn't this water fizzy?"

"What do you recommend for someone being tried in absentia?"

"Mom! Your cell phone’s ringing ... it’s Dad!"

"I didn't know she could body surf. Did you know she could body surf?"

Summer 2000: Children stumble upon the remains of Linda Tripp's old head.

"Live in the sunshine, swim in the sea, drink in the wild air." — Ralph Waldo Emerson "Catch tennis balls in the mouth." — Me

'No, I'm not stranded. This is the only place I could find that has no distractions.'

Working Holiday

Gone With the Wind: The Beach Blanket

'Couldn't you just bring a bucket and spade like other children?'

"The tide is coming in, sweetheart!"

"They met in the express-checkout lane at the A.&P. and have slowed down only occasionally ever since."

"Hello coastguard, it's my husband, he's beached"

"Mom! Don't think of me as covered with sand. Think of me as sugar coated."

The end of summer is near and you still haven't made plans

"That’s great, but where’s the Frisbee?!"

Wood Stain and Sun Tan Lotion

"Moments like this make me glad I taught you how to fetch mojitos."