Relaxing By The Sea T-Shirts

Sunblock, for insensitive skin.

"I said, 'I'm not on duty! I just came back to get my flip-flops.'"

'You'll see, it's great: When they come back from fishing, they clean the fish and throw us the heads, tails and guts...'

On holiday.

"Would you sit and watch a 12 hour movie?"

'I wasted half my life perched on top of a mountain in the Himalayas. Only to discover that the true meaning of life was a night in watching the box, with a few cans of lager.'

"I only need shade for my wine."

"Let's finish off our night of being productive by starting another season."

The real reason why flamingos are pink

Hollywood Breakup

"Just the slippers is fine!"

"I'd hold off on the peking duck another five minutes...the show's almost over."

"How's it look back there?"

"Should we take pics of our feed for Instagram?"

"This is what I call a home entertainment centre."

'I prefer to do absolutely nothing on holiday....otherwise the shock's too much when I get back.'

"I'm not the only one who hates you changing the channel every second. Now when you want to watch TV, the remote escapes."

Don't touch that dial! — We're experts, and we know what you should be watching!

"We can do this the easy way or the Hitchcockian way."

'Anything good on the telly tonight? Yes dear the vase!'

Admiral in the bath.

Flotation Device on the Phone

"Who's my perfect little excuse to leave social functions? You are, yes you are."

"I moved to the coast to get away from the Inland Revenue..."

"I'm getting bitten, and it's not by tall bond traders with accents."

"After the truffle season peaks, we like to kick back and do a little clamming."

"All the atmosphere of 'Murray Mound' but in the comfort of your own home!"

Surburban Joys - Haymaking.

"What'll it be ... scary movies or scary news?"

'You're so sophisticated and witty...and muscular...do you work out? Why, yes, I'd love to come back to your place.'

L.A. Law

Pearl Fishers

"Hey, Ben! We're in Maine now. We don't have to perform."

"No, this movie isn't dragging. You've got it on 'pause'."