Barnyard Jesters Gifts

'Don't leave me hanging!'

"Stick with me baby, and you'll eat slop every day."

'This model is hard to get parts for.'

Sick Rancher Humor

Police Cow!

'This is what Jack and me have managed to create so far...all you have to do is add your poop to the top and we have a field record!'

'Remember, chew every bite 32 times.'

"Gesundtheit, Dear."

You can always tell animals trained by 4H kids.

'Take a picture...it'll last longer.'

"Okay, now we're too domesticated."

Wife to husband dressed as pantomime cow: 'I know you're exhausted, love, but at least the panto season is now ... BEHIND YOU!!'

"Come off it, you're not working from dawn till dusk: You're working at dawn and at dusk..."

'Your barn door's open.'

'I've got to wake up extra early tomorrow morning. Any clue how to set this thing?'

Scrooge McCow

'Oi! We're your nipples you idiot!'

Doctor to pig: 'You've been pigging out on pan pizzas, eh? I'm taking you off square meals.'

"Dayum. She bootylicious."

"I didn't mean to trample him. How do you say 'my bad' in human?"

'He's been like this ever since he found out that he's a Rare Breed ...'

'Orchestra Pit Bull.'

A cow's bedside table.

"We need less cowbell!"

'Is it slop yet?'

'First of all, I want you to know that my door is always open...'

'Take it easy, you're a cow. They love cow humor.'

"Dad...how do you know when to stop?"

'Abandon Sheep.'

Junkyard and sign that reads 'Puttery Barn'.

'This is definitely one of eight conditions.'

"All your wife gave me was a little peck on the cheek!"

"Here's a funny joke for you. A bartender walks into a barn..."