Barn Living Aficionados Gifts

"You know, I think the novelty of living in a converted Barn is starting to wear off."

'Ok, here comes farmer Brown, put these on and remember.......act natural!'

"Ever eat a bird?"

"You're living in a fantasy world, Nelly. Farmer Dave doesn't know you're alive. Plus, he's a human being, he's married, he's the church pastor and he's secretly gay."

A Cow Striptease

"Next time, dear, ask me first before you invite a friend over for dinner."

'That hussy. She's always first in line for insemination.'

"What do you mean I eat as though I was born in a barn? I WAS born in a barn."

"Hey, you two, get a barn!"

Cow Christmas anxiety dreams!

'You can stop worrying about your husband Mrs.Dellrow...He's going to be fine,now that we have him in a stable condition.'

Warning: Not giving milk is hazardous to your health.

Pig tails connected. Title: 'Where Sausage Links Begin'

'Oh quit griping and be thankful we even got a bonus this year!'

Down On the Farm

"Wait … where’s Chicken Little? And who is ‘Kim Jong Un’?"

'Bloomin rare breeds.'

'Well, Dad, it's 2:00 AM and we've been messing with her all night...'

"The summer people are coming! The summer people are coming!"

Looks like you put too much dosie in that doe, Earl.

'How the heck is anyone supposed to lay with all this chitchat going on?'

"I stink... therefore, I am."

'It's got all the original features.'

'Abandon Sheep.'

Cow being clamped for milk.

...and this is you bedroom come dining room come kitchen come toilet!

Oh you baad bad girl!

Could you make me look a little bit more 'cowy'?

'I'd like to speak to the slop steward.'

'Mirror, mirror, on the silo, who's the studliest bull in Shiloh?'

Rooster writes out 'Things to cock-a-doodle-do.'

Fried Chicken.

"Oh, I was looking for something with a little more hay."