Bargain Finder Gifts

'Bargain basement sale ... Everything's down but the prices.'

"Anyone miss me?"

"Keeping up with the Joneses was too easy, so now we're trying to keep up with the deficit."

"Well, after a day of being thankful with my husband's parents and his siblings, I deserve a deal on s**t I don't need."

"No, there was no 'Buy One, Get One Free.' You're twins."

"It looks like our house got sick and threw up the attic."

Beach con-man.

'Now that I've lost weight, I can't afford new clothes in my size.'

Sale on the same stuff as last week.

"Freudian, Jungian, Adlerian – none of it compares to retail therapy."

'What do you do with the time you save?'

"It was terrifying experience being faced with that kind of compulsive, insane behaviour...I tell you it's positively the last time I put foot in the sales!"

Cut Price

"They're on special offer so I got three times more than I could ever use for twice as much as I could afford!"

Will work for ETFs

SALE

'You can forget the Captain's table-we're not paying that kind of money just to eat with the crew!'

"T-shirt weather's coming. How ready are you?"

"Wait a sec, I have a coupon around here somewhere."

Shop struggles to sell books about recession: '90 per cent off on all credit crunch books' (Titles incluude: Beat the Crunch! Who's to Blame? We're all Doomed!)

'It's nothing serious. Rest is the best cure for binge shopping.'

'If by 'great', you mean 'terrible', then yes, we have plenty of great beers for under $4.00 a six-pack.'

"Which of these will look the prettiest without the others?"

'That's what I thought, finances are tight: She's switched to no-name cat food...'

"If the economy's ground to a halt, we can help by carrying on shopping."

Hamlet's struggle with online shopping addiction. To eBay or not to eBay.

"I'm beginning to think that buy one, get one free is not always a good thing."

Thrift: New way to eat eggs (avoid needless transport costs).

"I saved us a hundred bucks on a Jolly Jumper."

(Visual gag) Wellard's annual BIG HANDBAG SALE!! A woman is dragging a huge bag out from a bag shop

Man sees sign stating dog for sale, house and land thrown in.

"It's a 'Black eye friday'. I got it in a fight over a 56 inch TV."

'My wife is going to kill me. All her shopping coupons are in that lost luggage.'

Countervailing Clichés.

"Sure, shopping online is faster and cheaper, but there's something almost sensuous about carrying an armload of packages!"