Barefoot Wanderer Gifts

'No luggage.'

'Hey,COOL headphones buddy'

'A barefoot fisherman is great! He gives us cover, and we can suck the leeches off his legs!'

Mr Tom Noddy's First Day With the Hounds Pt. 4

'Oh no...I'm living the dream.'

The incomplete Angler

"I don't know about you, but I don't like being a high school guidance counselor."

"This next one's a sad little number I call, 'I left my guitar on the F train.'"

Your own tedious thoughts next 200 miles

"Yes, we've been lost before, but never this lost."

"It takes years before some people are comfortable enough to say hello."

Counting Sheep

"I am having an alternative Christmas."

"If you can't sleep you may as well be productive and guard the meth lab."

'I'm having a day when I can't catch up!'

"My GPS says we’re not even close to the trail … and it’s blaming you."

'Leading the pack, fighting contenders, it was too stressful: I gave it up and became a lone wolf...'

'Global warming or not, it's still freezing here...'

Lone traveller is befriended by tourist from hell.

'Are you counting sheep again?'

Coast to coast walk.

"Far out, man."

I wandered lonely as a cloud in the shape of an insufferable jerk no one could stand to be around.

'Does anyone feel like I do?'

"I like sad songs."

'I have no idea who he is, I like to keep myself to myself.'

In the rain a country gent tells his sporting friend from town that they will have a lovely day because the frost has gone

A cancelled hunting trip

"You've reached '1-800-WATER-4-U.' Please leave a message."

Random things I miss: Deciding on a holiday

"I just can’t stand the loneliness anymore."

Mad or Noamd.

'I thought you're going to put the coffee on.'

North Pole Vet Service

Podologist