Bar Chatterbox Gifts

"I figure if I don't have that third martini, then the terrorists win."

'I hate to brag but my stalkers have their own reality show.'

"Yes Dad, I passed math and now I'm passing chemistry and physics."

"Could you please focus on the objective of this meeting, Tom... you can get back to your 300 followers later."

Pretty girls listen patiently. They know you'll soon get tongue-tied and won't be able to talk anymore.

Moo Out Loud

I love it when you speak Wall Streetese. Say 'to the upside' for me.

"I've had a lot of exercise today! I jumped to several conclusions, ran my mouth on the phone, and I just cycled through 500 cable channels!"

"Nice talking to you too, even if you are a recorded message."

The Mating Call of the Modern Youth

Fred's new phone plan included unlimited Dada.

"It's nice to be wanted."

"I like them. They hate the same things we do."

"Nope! He'd never set eyes on a water cooler in all his years in the office!"

'I don't like her line of gossip - it's never about anyone I know.'

'I don't get it. He's got only one tongue and two ears, but he talks twice as much as he listens.'

Person talks on phone as other blogs.

Flotation Device on the Phone

The Exhaustive Bro Catch Up

'What do you mean I've wolfed that down? You've never stopped nattering!'

"I told you never to call me here."

"I can't believe this! All these filthy messages on your cell phone! And so many of them! What is it? 100? 500? 1,000?"

'Have you heard the news about Susan in logistics?...'

'Cold hard facts are good, but to complete the picture, here's Brenda from the mailroom with some hot, juicy gossip.'

'Maybe the first couple of times, but believe me, the 'Are you following my Tweets' is no longer funny.'

'Can't we ever just have a conversation?'

At Gossips Anonymous...

"Who's up for some commercially successful music?"

'If that's the Police Station - we're not here!'

Time for Tea

Mummies and babies having a natter over lunch.

Eric knew where all the real slappers hang out.

Social media messages

"I can't even hear myself think now that everyone has a blog."

"If you think I talk too much, you should come right out say so! That way we can talk about it."