Baldness Banter Lover Gifts

'Poor Fred -- he thought he'd get his hair back.'

Furley hair transplant clinic - Christmas tree needles falling out in clinics window.

"I just edited your Wikipedia entry." "Big whoop." "What a coincidence, that's what scientists have classified you as: Bigwhoop." "...The much grumpier, much louder, and much, much older second cousin of Bigfoot." "You lousy son of a..." "Wait... thank you. That's very flattering."

'We were thinking of naming him after his daddy, but I don't really like the name, Old slap head.'

An Archeologic Dig

Snail Pattern Balding.

"Where do you see yourself in five pints time?"

Mail Pattern Baldness - A man with a bald patch in the form of a mailing envelope.

The barber

'Hey, look. This anti hair loss treatment is finally working. My hair's stopped falling out!'

Operation Chrome Dome.

Balding gnomes

This is what Fred gets for wishing for more hair.

Your male pattern baldness is partly genetic and partly hereditary.

Bald man with a brush on his head

'I wish I had more hair.' 'Don't be a silly billy. You've got plenty of hair. Here's your bald, I mean your boiled, egg.'

"I may have bird legs but at least I don't have crow's feet."

Can't stand him. He really gets on my nerves, he does. Old curmudgeon embarrassing himself like that."

'Here comes Ted.'

"I'll have a Maker's Mark, and she'll have a shot at being the mother she never was."

"I don't regret going bald. I just regret growing bald before I had a chance to rock a man bun."

'You're trying to find yourself? -- No offense, but if I were you, I'd look for somebody ELSE.'

STILL LIVES - Double Head Match: 'I think we're a match made in heaven.' 'It seems more like the the work of the Devil to me!'

"Some prop-forward he's turned out to be."

'I think you're rocking the bold look, too!'

'I do hope you enjoy your birthday lie-in, dear.'

"When we get inside, remember to use your indoor whining and complaining voice."

'You can't make a wit out of two half wits.'

'Have we met someplace? Yes, that's why I quit going there.'

The less celebrated, but still spectacular, combover eagle.

"He's a good boy, but he sheds like crazy."

'Global warming, international terrorism, melting polar ice caps, receding hairline... It's all very worrying.'

"We took a yachting holiday last year, strayed into the Bermuda Triangle, miraculously made it home somehow, but Brian's hair disappeared."