Baldness Banter Extraordinaire Gifts

'I think of my 'bald-patch' as a solar panel for a sex-machine!'

'We were thinking of naming him after his daddy, but I don't really like the name, Old slap head.'

Snail Pattern Balding.

Mail Pattern Baldness - A man with a bald patch in the form of a mailing envelope.

The barber

'Hey, look. This anti hair loss treatment is finally working. My hair's stopped falling out!'

Balding gnomes

This is what Fred gets for wishing for more hair.

Bald man with a brush on his head

Your male pattern baldness is partly genetic and partly hereditary.

'I wish I had more hair.' 'Don't be a silly billy. You've got plenty of hair. Here's your bald, I mean your boiled, egg.'

'Global warming, international terrorism, melting polar ice caps, receding hairline... It's all very worrying.'

The less celebrated, but still spectacular, combover eagle.

"He's a good boy, but he sheds like crazy."

Bald hairdresser recomending hair restoring lotion

"We took a yachting holiday last year, strayed into the Bermuda Triangle, miraculously made it home somehow, but Brian's hair disappeared."

"All in favor of toupees, say aye."

"Well, did it work?"

"Good news, we found a plant the cured baldness."

"Operator, get me my hair!"

"Someday, son, all of yours will be this."

"Hey - a crop circle! Let's land here...."

Half full head of hair, half empty head of hair.

'I'm prescribing Rogaine for your head and Roloss for your back.'

"Not too much off the top, Floyd!"

'You can tell when you're getting older when your ears are hairier than your head!'

Combs for the bald.

Man has special three-pronged comb for the three hairs on his head.

Furley hair transplant clinic - Christmas tree needles falling out in clinics window.

"You have no idea how embarrassing it is to be a bald lion. This morning a cub mistook me for his mother."

Dad, if there was a hair fairy, you'd be rich."

'How long has it been since you visited your mother?'