Backtracking Enthusiast Gifts

"If we can't find the way forward, let's find the way back."

"No, it wasn't a sinkhole. Your old TV was so heavy the ground could no longer take the weight."

Excess Baggage: In the old days folks called 2 weeks with 4 kids in a non-air conditioned car a vacation.

GO AHEAD ... MAKE MY DAY!

STRIP Hambone: Early diesel run computer

"And this is one of our most poular models..."

"Hank brings five years of top sales experience to our team so lets try to make him feel welcome as he makes you all look bad."

"It's a fantastic computer! It's so old that none of today's hackers know how to hack it!"

Early on-line shopping

"It's very sweet of you to visit him. Mr. Mainframe doen't get out much since the desktops came in."

'Sorry, I can't help you, the computer's down again.'

"If I can't use a calculator, may I use my Dad's old slide-rule?"

'As you know, some of us can't keep up with the pace of new technology.'

"I know we said we would get you a laptop.. but this will have to do until business gets better."

"I know we said we'd get you a laptop,but this will have to do until business improves."

"Well you said you wanted a simple, cheap solution!" (IT Solutions).

'Gentlemen, invent your engines.'

'I call it 'Myspace'''

'You said I should check back with you if I didn't get any better. . .'

"We were looking for a non-hackable, energy efficient data center. Thanks for the file cabinet."

'We couldn't give away black-and-white TVs until we started advertising them as having 'non multi-color capability'.'

'We've got to upgrade our computer system. Downloading information on this one takes too long.'

'When I was told our new computer was going to be state of the art, no one mentioned it was state of the art in 1954.'

"You're right. I have to come up with a brake of some kind."

Old and new technologies

"Hi..just ringing to see if you got my e-mail?"

He still refuses to upgrade.

'Look, several prisoners in my client's facility have reported finding God in their cells! Yet you claim you've never broken in one time?'

'...please switch of all mobile phones, paging devices and alarm watches...'

Acme Slide Rules: 'We'll be here and ready, when the current electronic gadgetry fad fades!'

"It was the best of times, it was the worst of times..."

'In case of computer bug break glass.'

"Rats! It doesn't work...but why?? Why??!!"

R. J. Willoby - Old Money, Old Technology, Member 'Good Old Boys Network'.

"For a list of the ways artificial intelligence is killing your job, please press one."