Back Pain Warriors Gifts

'I just invented the 'chair' - It relieves lower back pain!'

'He threw his back out trying to lift an embargo.'

'Conquer the known world and, er...that's it.'

Lumbar support animal

Jesus's First and Less-Heralded Miracle Walk,

'It's a beautiful lighthouse. However, hauling the batteries up the stairs has taken its toll on my back.'

'That's the last time I'm sitting in the front row!'

"Well, the first thing we're going to do is loosen those suspenders!"

'I've got an appointment with Mr. Payne.' - 'He'll see you now.' - 'Okay, take a deep br-' - 'Gah!' - 'Great, now turn ov-' - 'Argh!' - 'And a final tw-' - 'Mummy!' - '*Sob*' - 'Okay, all done.' - 'Did you, by any chance...' - '...hear you crying...'

"Yeah, it's work-related, Doc...I bent over backwards trying to please my boss!"

Old Geriatric Hitchhiker holding a sign saying 'Last Fling',

Woman walking a pelvis on a lead.

"Too hard?"

'You threw your back out? Well, run out and retrieve it!'

"My goodness, your back is really knotted up this morning, isn't it?"

'That's Saint Throbbold. Patron saint of migraine.'

"Well, yeah, Doc, I twisted my back a little...but it was the longest golf shot I've ever made!"

'Exactly which school of acupuncture are you from?'

'Don't be frightened, he's only been 'n' gone 'n' done his back in again.'

'You're going to have to find a way of avoiding those fast serves!'

'I have stomach cramps.' - 'Oh.' - 'It feels like a cat raking its claws down the inside of my stomach.' - 'Oh.' - 'Raking in a good way or a bad way?' -

"My back hurts when I sit."

'This is going to be a level three.'

Guy hanging in dungeon to other: 'Are you sure this chiropractor is licensed?'

'The swelling well receed in a few days and the racket should slide right off.'

'Oh, thank god, a hot tub... My back is literally killing me.'

"Lately, when I wake up, I'm stiff as a board!"

Fertility Clinic next to Headache Clinic

"Relax! That first crack is just me getting past your deductible."

'Aargh! -- if the Lord had meant for man to walk upright, He'd have given us chiropractors!'

"Next time, try warming up with a little idle speculation before jumping to a conclusion."

'I should have gone to my chiropractor before this meeting.'

'Hey! Suddenly, my back feels way better! Weird...'

"It's for my back. You have two more questions."

"I'm fed up with Notre Dame - I've decided to go straight."