Babysitting Gifts

Crying parent holds crying baby.

Baby talk 101 - Whaaaaa! 'This is a good one. It means, 'Until my every need is met, your life will be hell'.'

'I didn't get the Owners Manual. I thought you got the Owners Manual.'

"I didn't want anything. I just wanted to see how fast you could get here in case of an emergency!"

'Let me go over your symptoms again; you have a 'gugu' and you're feeling a little 'bugaga'.'

Changing the baby.

"I'm bored."

'Please tell me you're baby sitting?'

"Still won't talk. We've tried everything aside from sodium pentothal."

'You don't have to look after them much at this age - they don't remember anything.'

'The child is very illogical'

'He's been having temper tantrums. Can you recommend a good anger management course?'

The Impractical Guide to Babies: 'Got a clever one here...'

"Where's your nose?"

'Either switch off his batteries or take 'em out!'

'There's no such thing as 'safe sex'!'

'Still having problems finding a baby sitter?'

'You've no need to worry wile we're out - he wont let anyone come near the place.'

"It's hard to believe the adults think he's so lovable!"

'They don't understand goo-goo-gah-gah. Dumb it down to WHAAAAAH!'

Hells angels' babysitter.

'Oh good! You got the kids to bed!'

Janey then realized that babysitting isn't easy...

"And the last little piggy cried, 'Oui, oui, oui' all the way home."

"Have your grandchildren been visiting again, Cora?"

"Maureen Alsop is leaving her magnolia, and her delphinium and her cats with us this weekend."

"See you later, Debbie. Try to combine the firm yet sensitive supervision of Mr. Clinton with the strict yet compassionate stewardship of Mr. Dole."

"We can't leave her with my parents! Do you want her to turn out like me?"

"Mom, can you come get me?"

"Okay, the lawn chair seemed to quiet him down, but don't go anywhere with that ladder."

"Just think of it as gramma's binkie."

"Funny, I don't remember signing up for this."

"I haven't been in a playpen yet that could hold me."

Tilly Slowboy

A baby biting a boys wristwatch