Baby's First Year Gifts

"They grow up so fast."

Well, we thought we had childproofed the house

16 months, wow – it seems like only yesterday you were 14 months.

Young Frank Lloyd Wright

"His first out-of-body experience."

Madonna of the Pukes.

A young Don King

Fat Kid 10- Eats an ice-cream

"Honey, you're spoiling that child."

'They don't understand goo-goo-gah-gah. Dumb it down to WHAAAAAH!'

"It only goes forwards and backwards. So, you won't need a GPS."

A tube of toothpaste doesn't reach its full potential until in the hands of a baby.

Baby's first thought...Daddy's a moron.

Twenty-first century baby walker

'That reminds me, the seat broke on mine. I must make time to get it repaired.'

'Can you tell me what I've written? I can't read!'

"He doesn't really talk yet, but he does some sound bites."

"....But then I find myself saying, what if there isn't more to life than this?"

Baby Einstein. Baby Frankenstein.

Susie knew she could rely on big Ted for comfort.

Green Balloon

Resourceful toddler

Child using building blocks to get over a baby gate.

Baby Playing Violin

'Sure, I took your shovel. Ethics doesn't kick in for a year or two.'

'Do I like kids? You bet I do: I deliver babies for a living...'

"It's his emotional support animal."

"Honey, where's the baby?" "The first voyage of Sinbad"

"Sorry, that was just the wet diaper talking."

Baby tells other Baby to call.

"Soon you'll be sucking your thumb AND tying your shoes...they call it multitasking."

A Tit for Tat.

Mother feeds messy child with extra long spoon.

'A is for Arse.'

'We apologise for the delay to the yum-yum train.'