Baby Milestone Tracker Gifts

"Not to alarm you, but the other newborns are already ahead."

'Are you finished eating yet, sweetie?...Guess that answers THAT question!'

Fat Kid 10- Eats an ice-cream

When a toddler hands you their ringing toy phone, you answer it!

Child laughs while making farting sound under arm. Dad says, 'Isn't it nice when they find something they're good at?

'Oh Darling, you must be so proud: Your first wart!'

'At lone at last.'

"Here's the baby's first birthday, her second, her third, look at her gifts..."

'Baby's first two-step.'

"Mum, Dad, I think I might be bipedal."

His first conspiracy theory...'Is it a coincidence the first time I walk, they start locking all the cupboards? I think not!'

One!

Don't be surprised --- They always start out as quadrupeds.

A family trying to make a child smile for a photo

"What do you think is a good step goal for someone who's just started walking?"

"No, it's still just a thirst for spaghettios."

First Steps

Impractical Guide to Having Babies: This is solids?

'He's my personal potty trainer.'

Eagle parenting.

"Charles, look! He’s sending his first text!"

"Birth, bed, bath, beer, bankruptcy, bifocals, balding and beyond."

'Jimmy made his first blog post today.'

"I'm too old for baby limas."

"Worthy of an Oscar don't you think?"

'The baby cut a tooth today.'

'How old? He's 14 months, 3 days, 7 hours and 16 seconds... 17... 18...'

"Honey, your head's through the armhole again."

Proud parents take a photo of their potty-trained child.

'Look, he's taking his first steps.'

'Her first telekinesis!'

"And we're just so proud you're walking to school alone. Aren't we, Harold?"

Baby's first horror movies

'Look daddy,look! I'm exactly 3 feet tall!' (a child foot getting measured for height).

'She's just done her first tweet.'