Baby Gear Pillows

"It's new. You like it? I'm on the fence."

Rocket priced prams.

"We realize that kids start using technology at a younger age these days, so our strollers come with Bluetooth, Wi-Fi and GPS."

Mum and baby both have pacifier.

"Does knowing you're being watched on a baby monitor keep you out of mischief?"

Gracie's baby toys.

"It's difficult to attract a younger customer when our main demographic is babies."

'No creamed peas for me today!'

'He was getting too heavy to carry around in my pouch.'

"If we're lucky, she'll get a single wear out of this."

Baby reading 'To do list'.

Constructing your own prison!

Mothercare - " I'm going to shop till I drop."

A (P)ram.

I'm looking for a useful gift for a newborn. Nature's Baby Boutique. We have a large selection of essentials. Here are the 100% organic, fair trade, hand-dyed pashimina diaper covers. Wow! Nothing says "essential" like popped-on pashimina. A little dry-cleaning and it's good as new.

'This buggy gets only about one mile per gal.'

'We actually meant to order a baby monitor, but he was so cute we just had to keep him.'

'It's nothing to be concerned about - until his first tooth comes in he'll be connected to devices via bluegum.'

Eskimo pram

"Where can I get one of those?"

'Where's the steering wheel on this damn thing?'

Child in baby sling sees rucksack - 'I look like that?'

"I thought I liked babies, but, as it turned out, I mainly like baby clothes."

'I bought it off the irregular rack, but I'm hoping he'll grow into it.'

Dummy Sucking Area

Parents compare buggies

"I dunno. It just doesn't "feel" like a diaper."

Wow! Look at these cool shower presents. Nature's Baby Boutique. 100% natural baby soaps, changing pads, bottle holders, safety gates and classical music tapes. Plus stroller, crib and swaddling blankets. Without all this stuff � How could you ever have a natural baby?

'They're a bit pricey, but on the other hand, I don't have to buy any baby gates.'

"Shall we go talk with those au pairs?"

"It's a boy!"

'As his grandfather, I suggest you purchase the one with the side impact guards and heavy duty bumper.'

'Wh? There's that noise again. Sounds like a (shudder) baby's rattle!'

'Harry's living in the past.'

"I'm looking for a rattle that both informs and entertains."