Baby Bonding Stories Gifts

'All I want for Christmas is my old shape back again.'

"This is a great spot to practice mighty roars son..."

Cry babies.

Uncle demonstrating chemical experiments to children

Late night teddy reading

'Please make us instruments of Thy peace, starting with Bucky Sims.'

Young golf ball getting "the talk".

'She's just great with the children.'

"First, I sent a rocket of a drive down the fairway, then I took the 7-iron, put that ball on the green...a hundred and eighty yards if it was an inch..."

Goodnight Moon for the Misbegotten

"Oh, Aunt Em, it wasn't a dream. It was a place. And you and you and you ... and you were there. But not that man with the straitjacket."

A child interrupting family prayers

This is the new Director's Cut version of Hansel and Gretel...with additional scenes and three alternative endings!!!

"I'll get up in negative five minutes."

"Dad, can we have a bedtime narrative?"

Yoga with Baby

"These are my fish cymbalta, otezla, skyrizi, vraylar and stelara!"

'Don't touch that tooth, dad. I'm expecting the tooth fairy at any moment.'

"I consider every member of our family to be like family."

"I said, was... it... a... difficult... birth?"

"Well did he?"

"And this little piggy went – whoa! Where is your fifth little piggy?!"

"When I was your age, we wished on stars. Now, we wish on satellites!"

"Today, son, you are a man."

"There's no way we can get him ow. He's completely under the covers."

"You're using the boogeyman as an excuse to shut me out."

"There's nothing wrong with my car. . ."

'The cow jumped over the Moon? -- What was SHE on?'

"Dad! I can't believe we come to the beach and you set up all the way out here! I can barely see the ocean...we're so far from the wa..."

"Why did I start the story with 'Twice upon a time?' Because it's a sequel."

"Am I looking happy or sad in the appropriate places?"

"It doesn't say, Son, whether or not Noah wore a captain's hat."

Baby Bear.

"The mad king ruled by chaos and corruption. He pitted everyone against each other, and they all lived divisively ever after. The end."

'...and then the DOW rallied six hundred points and the three bears felt like idiots...'