Baby Banter Specialist Gifts

"What are you in for?"

'No hair or teeth, can't walk or talk -- he's kind of a starter kit.'

"Why don't you come get me? Oh that's right, you aren't allowed on the couch!"

First Word

"Have you met my bodyguard?"

"Give her some space! She's overdosing on baby talk!"

'I knew you would come crawling back.'

Babble. Pbl. Babama. Bbb. Brb. Bod.

"I'll have a man overboard!"

"You do realise that this position is only for the assistant bootlicker to the CEO?"

She never said "Da-da." She went right to "data."

Proud mums.

Newborn making the V-sign

'No hair or teeth, can't walk or talk -- it's hard to believe we're related.'

'I thought I might try a bit of Stand-up.'

"No chance of accumulating frequent birthing points in here. This is the only trip I'll take."

'I finally memorized my social security number.'

'I guess I wasn't thinking. I bought a return ticket.'

CCTV? Good grief, what do they think I'm going to vandalise in here??

"We don’t care if it’s a boy or a girl, as long as it’s not annoying."

"You've really outdid yourself this time. A real masterpiece!"

Fat Kid 18- Makes lego dentures

"Look! the poor kid's prematurely BALD!"

'My god, he's insane.'

Baby Going to Toilet on Father.

'He said his first words today. . . 'buy' and 'google'.'

'This is the crib phone. You have the wrong extension.'

"Baby FOMO."

'Isn't he a little young for sideburns?'

I think she's about to say her first word!

'Wait a minute...what am I doing? I can't count yet.'

"Personnel can't fund maternity cover,but they will second someone to come around and coo oooh! aah! when the baby's born..."

'She just got her first credit card application in the mail.'

"You are accused of throwing your toys out of the pram."

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