Awkward Introducer Gifts

"Mom, Dad – this is Gloria."

"Well, I had 'the talk' with him.

'I like you, you remind me of someone.'

"How sweet, your hand is trembling."

What price beauty?

"I've been out of the dating scene a long time. Is kissing still a thing?"

"And I never kiss in the first two seconds."

'Would you like to come in for a rejection?'

People I've Met At Parties Whose Names I've Forgotten

'Here goes the second bottle of champagne... I think it would be fair of You to tell me what are my chances so I know whether to order another bottle or not...'

"Don't worry, I'm a doctor."

'I'm not sure I want to see you again, but just in case, I've backed you up on a flash drive.'

"Dating advice from your old man? Ew, weird. Instead, let's ask Stinky Rick."

'Ah, it seems that I've completely misjudged the mood of the evening.'

"Tell your date you're a vegetarian before he orders that expensive gourmet dinner."

Hugs and knucklebumps don't mix.

"Actually, I don't know anybody here. I was just passing the house when I heard all the fun."

After two years on zooms, Arthur was having trouble coping with face to face networking again. . .

'... And now I shall pass you over to tonight's speaker who will give a brief summary of my introduction.'

"Tell me about yourself... what you do, where you live, the last four digits of your social security number..."

"Please to meet you, though I'm sorry about the circumstances."

Nethead strip: Dates

'You two will have lots in common - you share the same anxiety neurosis.'

'Bill, I'm sorry to hear about your going into the hospital. Is it a MALE problem?'

Send. End.

"Does this mean I have to talk to someone I don't know?"

"I'm not used to communicating face-to-face. Can we conduct this interview via text?"

'It's not you it's me not liking you.'

A shy parish cleric seeking to talk business with a lady

'I never know what to do with my hooves at a party.'

"Have you talked to Baldo about girls lately?"

"I hope we haven't come at a bad time."

'How can you possibly be busy washing your hair for the rest of your life???'

'Mom, did I come preassembled or did you and dad have to put me together?'

Inexplicably Sharon was not interested in a second date.