Avid Readers Gifts

"Baldo, no normal kid is excited about summer ending."

"Did you like that mystery book?"

'Peter the Flying Hippo is my favorite storybook character without any merchandising tie-ins.'

'Look! The new long awaited, highly anticipated but ultimately disappointing novel by that guy you like.'

'Are you sure I should read my book report to the class? --�It's PG-13.'

Dickens & Tolstoy Walk into a Bar: " . . . so, to make a short story long . . . "

Birds reading over woman's shoulder

Beware of the crafty Kia bird of New Zealand.

'I love it here. It really floats my boat.'

Old Lady in shoe driving a footie (sock) car.

"Gifted class, indeed! One is gifted in science, but can't rad - one is fixed in reading, but won't even try math..."

"Mrs. Berg calls my book report a finely crafted debut and she looks forward to my next effort."

"Barb's such a fast reader."

'Social and political revolution? Check out our 'Do It Yourself' section.'

"At least she's reading."

"Did you ask for the large print edition?"

Death comes to both the Archbishop and the Salesman in Venice

'I'm pretty sleepy tonight, Dad - could we just skip ahead to the chase scene?'

'I can't remember the title, but it began, 'Once upon a time'...'

Self-Improvement, Self-Empowerment, Self-Aggrandizement

"When in the course of human events it becomes... Oh, blast it! Adams is just going to edit the heck out of this..."

TV vs Reading

'Go and fish Darling, I'll be fine: I have some reading for the next few weeks...'

Tom, you may not want to pause so long at the top of your swing.

Virginia Foxx Caricature

Dog Training. Most of the choices the dogs made for their book reports are logical. The labrador retriever chose "Catch-22." The terrier, who loves to dig, chose "Journey to the Center of the Earth." The basset hound is doing his on "The Howling." and the shar-pei picked "A Wrinkle in Time." But the dachshund's choice confuses me. Even with the ground-hugging physique, he selected "Wuthering Heights."

"Think about the perks. You learn to read, you get a pre-approved library card!"

The Subtitle

Quite literary.

"Poor kid, his parents gave him a book for Christmas."

"Oh, that reminds me of this article I barely remember."

'I'm looking for something not too heavy.'

"The Founding Fathers?! Ha! That’ll never stick!"

"Look Mommy, reserves!"

Your Luggage