Avian Reader Gifts

Birds reading over woman's shoulder

'A burp or a fart, I can excuse, but throwing up a pellet of fur and bones? That's gross dude!'

"Do me next."

'Look! The new long awaited, highly anticipated but ultimately disappointing novel by that guy you like.'

Sign in tree from bird "next appearance 3:00 pm"

'And when did you have your last owl movement?'

Audio Books

So you're a mocking bird...

Bird Torture.

'Hon? Did your phone go dead? Hello?'

"It started rather well, but then, you sang two wrong notes, so that's a fail in my book. Try again at the next mating season..."

Dickens & Tolstoy Walk into a Bar: " . . . so, to make a short story long . . . "

"Migration ruins my 10,000 steps."

I no longer migrate. It's easier to just telecommute.

Old Lady in shoe driving a footie (sock) car.

"Gifted class, indeed! One is gifted in science, but can't rad - one is fixed in reading, but won't even try math..."

"Nevermore." "You don't have to use 'air quoths' every time."

Why would birdie need newspaper?

'I think he's lonely.'

"Barb's such a fast reader."

"Mrs. Berg calls my book report a finely crafted debut and she looks forward to my next effort."

'There's too many of us... I'm going to start forming a 'W'.'

'It's true what they say: People often look like their pets...'

Pet Shop - Parrot labeled as 'Good Listener'

"Do you think the birds like me?"

Bird about to dive from diving board into birdbath

"....H....5....N...1...???You got me.... but I'm sure it spells trouble."

Large print e-book.

"Never Again." (bird sitting on a giant egg).

'You had better eat those intestinal organs or there's no dessert for you!'

'Don't believe everything you read in the papers!' (Vicar to lady reading the war cry).

"Those are the lyrics? How embarrassing—I've been singing it wrong this whole time."