Avian Expert Gifts

'What's happened? Why are you giving him mouth-to-mouth resuscitation?'

"Do me next."

So you're a mocking bird...

I no longer migrate. It's easier to just telecommute.

'It's true what they say: People often look like their pets...'

"Have you decided on what you'd like to have?"

Inflatable Duck Boat

"....H....5....N...1...???You got me.... but I'm sure it spells trouble."

Bird about to dive from diving board into birdbath

Why doesn't birdie go soaring on high like other birds?

Flamingo on a bird table feeding from a shrimp container.

"Those are the lyrics? How embarrassing—I've been singing it wrong this whole time."

"Why on earth do you insist on coming to this miserable, isolated, rocky, small island every year to roost? It's covered in guano! Disgusting..."

'Will you stop! You know that freaks me out!'

'...and I'm telling you that Budgie sneezed!!'

"Did no one tell you that at this time of year everybody flies south?"

"My God, you're right ... it all makes sense. I crossed the road because of my parents!"

'I'm making one of the craters into a birdbath.'

Bird feeder being used by vultures.

'Here he comes in his jimjams - cutting it fine with out breakfast today!'

"Lovely robin ... though, I'm sensing a little attitude."

'Geez, what's with the delay?'

'She says she has a prenatal appointment.'

"Darling, there's an offer for a time-share nest in Florida: Should we apply?"

'I had a very unhappy egghood....'

"Well, I'm sorry but there appears to be no vacancies down south"

'Crumbs! I'm holding out for the whole loaf.'

'Thankfully he doesn't talk!'

Balding eagle looking back through his yearbook.

"Geese today just don't seem to take pride in their appearance."

'Did they find the black box?'

"I think we feed to many vitamins to Tweety"

"Get a life!"

Ophiologist