Avant-garde Style Gifts

Bob tries, unsuccessfully, to wear the world as a loose garment.

Turd - 'It's one of a kind.'

"No, ma'am. I'm not sure what the difference is between being creative or just plain weird."

Jazz is Invented

"Well, yes, it's not what you would call a practical nest, but my wife insisted on using an architect..."

"Avant-garde jazz hands"

'It's cutting edge theatre.'

"I condensed my painting to the pure essence of the message. What helps me a lot is the fact that I've got nothing to say at all."

When at a loss for words Colin would often resort to communicating through the medium of contemporary dance.

Yoko Ono

'I don't know whether to put it in for the Turner Prize or go for the Poet Laureate.'

Blend Schools

Samuel Beckett

'I saw an offbeat play the other night. No one took off their clothes.'

"I'm outside the fancy dress shop...."

"I can deal with the conceptual art and electronic music, but what are these hors d'oeuvres supposed to be."

"Please turn on your cell phones."

"Tonight the part normally played by the audience will be played by actors playing the part of the audience."

Richard Wagner's other Ring Cycle.

Cover Design for the Savoy (No. 8)

"No sitting on the art, ma'am."

Francis Picabia

Samuel Beckett

'As a hairdresser, I must say you take it a bit far.'

Artist uses connect-the-dots canvas to paint nude model.

James Joyce

Ave Atque Vale- Illustrates Beardsley's Translation of Carmen CI of Catullus

A retriever comes back to a hunter with Brancusi's 'Bird in Space'."

Pants Uglifier!

Tracey Emin

Toilet Art.

"Stop complaining, granite is in."

The Death of Pierrot

"Once upon a time there were these three little pigs. There was a neurotic little pig, a psychotic little pig, and a normal little pig . . . ."

'..the sound of no hands clapping...'